Bliss

This past week I got some dvd's delivered and wow. There was such a deep level of bliss and contentment that I have whenever I'm indulging a film on a Friday night. I finally watched the Shape of Things and I've been marinating on it since. I need to rewatch it again because I genuinely feel like that movie has changed me on such a deep level. It has really challenged me to think about my views on morality, art, relationships and self love. 10/10 would recommend. I also got Sleeping With The Enemy on dvd and the film from a critical standpoint is okay...but it has become one of my comfort movies. There's something about a woman escaping an unfavorable situation and curating her own space that I just LOVE! When she went to Iowa, moved into that beautiful home and made apple pie with the apples that she picked from the neighbors tree, it just warms my soul. Also I love a porch swing!! Films like Enough or Under the Tuscan Sun give me those warm vibes as well. I'm sure there's some psychological explanation for that, but I'll leave that for my therapist to decipher. Also I made some freezer vegan breakfast burritos and they are delicious and fulfilling. I'm really proud of myself for continuing to take steps forward, even if it is something small like meal prepping or watching a dvd. I'm starting to feel alive again! I would do so many things out of survival and it feels nice to be shifting out of that space. Something as simple as intentionally choosing the entertainment I want to watch and doing so just because it brings me joy is something that I've missed! Doing things, just because it brings you pleasure isn't a bad thing. I have an interesting relationship with pleasure, I subconsciously used to believe that I had to do something in exchange for or had to earn the reward of pleasure. It wasn't something I felt I could have, just because. Of course, balance is important too! As cliche as it sounds, sometimes you really need to just stop and smell the flowers. Because why not? Life is already hard enough, the world won't fall apart if you take a moment to just breathe. Speak - Jhene Aiko is the vibe. ALSO (VERY RANDOM) WHY TF ARE THE CECRED EDGE DROPS SOLD OUT EVERYWHERE?!?! I NEED TO SUPPORT THE QUEEN AND MY FOLLICLES!!!