Perception$

A few weeks ago my therapist asked me if I consider how I’m perceived by others and my answer was no. I used to be obsessed with how I was being perceived, but somewhere along the way, I came to the conclusion that people were committed to misunderstanding me. I then forced myself to only care about how I feel about myself because that’s all I can control, to a point. This has helped me gain a better understanding of myself, but I’m also seeing how it can hinder new interactions. I wish to rid myself of the belief that everyone has a negative perception of me. One of my fears is that people would come to a conclusion about who they think I am based on how I look. I fear being perceived as too much, not enough or vapid because I like fashion and makeup. If someone has that perception, they aren’t for me anyways. But I still want to protect myself from the possibility of rejection. I also like philosophy, films and black womanhood. I want others to give me a chance, but first I have to give myself a chance to be known.